you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Randomize
