dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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