Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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