D3 body, D1 cock
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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