She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
