you didnt know i had herpes?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
