She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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