Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Even my vagina gasped.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize