She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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