but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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