Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
