your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
is that a dick in a sweater?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
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