he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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