i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
