walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
