3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
