Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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