Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
