and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
My life is pants optional.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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