i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
