There was a lot of him and a little penis
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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