I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
