listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
