You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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