I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Randomize
