just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
