she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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