i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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