hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
