office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
