I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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