Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
