Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
