this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
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