All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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