you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
