Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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