Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
