he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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