He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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