If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
