i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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