maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Randomize