I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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