forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
