She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
