do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
