Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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