So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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