You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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