Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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